Our Dark Past rewrite
by Akanami no Kiku
Summary: I decided to rewrite this as a full on story.
1. Chapter 1

**Everything you need to know is on the original oneshot on my profile. THE WARNINGS ARE ALSO THERE. So what you read don't question. I hope you enjoy and I'lll try to breath a little life back into this story.**

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><p>What is it about life that makes us and everyone else so crazy? We struggle to reach that place in life, where our names will live on forever. We all in some way strive for that in our youth. At fifteen it's a given. For me it was going to happen. But not the way I wanted. I always believed the crazed ideas and dreams I had would stay in my head. I was wrong. Those fantasies and crazy tales would become warped into the senseless tale that would be known as my life. It was anything but a fairytale, and I'd feel more like a whore or a rape victim then a princess. The tale I was going to live would be filled with dark twists and truths, I could only pray at times for sanity and survival.<p>

I was crying. I felt warm, like i was near an open flame. I would latter find out I was discovered in a caravan fire. It was a mystery how it happened, some member of the council saw it as a God-send delivering me unto them, bring a slight peace. I was a convenient outlet for this devil child among their numbers. No one miss an orphaned outsider, no one had to know I even existed and for most of my life no one did. It was a perfect plan that back fired violently. It only taught Naruto how to make a mask of emotion.

They had been on this dilemma for awhile, a method to keep Naruto in line. He was a picky high class child who at only a month old began to show his demonic power. He began showing he wanted for the best and claiming what he wanted. He made it difficult to have a caretaker because he would either grow bored of them or attacked them. Many feared what would happen to them if they became "favored". None wished to be a possible chew toy for the finicky child.

Opening my eyes confirmed just that which I would latter find and have many night terrors about latter. I wailed as loud and long as my lungs would let me. Bright burning flames and choking smoke surrounded me to such an extent it was like I had enter the very bowels of hell. All the while wondering about why I couldn't speak, or how I just couldn't seem to roll over. Was I going to die? Was everything I was or could be going to fade away, ashes to ashes and dust to dust? Was all I had ever done for this to be lost to cruel harsh flames? Is that how undesirables felt as they were enclosed in crematoriums for mass execution in the death camps? Was this how the damned felt?

Suddenly I was lifted up, redeemed from this apparent realm of pain and death. I was still crying on a lesser level, but still in slight panic. I had been so close to death, just a hairs breath away, from being burned and painfully scared for what little life I may have attained if had survived at all. So close, so much so that safety, the mere notion of it, shocked almost what little life I thought I still had in me. What was it with the sudden changes didn't work well with people of bad health, and short tempers. God, this was to much, if you trying to teach me a lesson I've learned I swear! I'll join a convent on my honor, and is the world suppose to spin that way?

A low voice, a strange silver )or was it white haired figure), he spoke softly to me, soothingly. I tried to speak to discover who this giant was. He rocked me and I finally freed a hand, I intended to lash out with it. I wanted down away, away from this sudden madness that over come my being. I was convinced that this being had something to do with all this, well really I was just highly upset and angry and wanted hit something right now. It was a silver haired boy who took my small fingers in his, allowing me to grip his in turn . Then it clicked, like a shot in the back, I was small, my hands smooth body, confined and thus I realized I was wrapped in a baby blanket, I was all but a babe. He rocked me softly and my cries faded, I fell a sleep.

Someone else was crying now. Longer and much louder than I had been just awhile ago. A weight shifted next to me, so close it was startling. I risked seeing the being I sensed looking intently at me. It was a larger babe, for I came to accept that is what I had become. He had blonde hair and big blue eye, he was oddly beautiful in a sunny kind of way, happiness seemed to pour out his visage, but not his aura. A dark feeling seemed to permeate from him and taint the air.

He looked as if he'd never seen another baby. But it was highly possible. He could crawl; he easily moved his hand to touch me. His hand was chubby, and he moved it over my check as if savoring the feel. It was strange, near disturbing the way he closed his eyes to imprint the moment into his mind. He seemed fascinated by the warm that my form gives off. He was oddly cold but her was surrounded by high quality materials. He was as pampered prince in a bed of gold. And why was he starring at me like a piece of meat.

Voices could be heard, they spoke about us. How my "parents" and the group that they were traveling with fell victim to a raid and were now dead. How the boy, Naruto, had never been so silent. How they decided the two of us together might negate the ill effects. What ill effects something political or social that had befallen this boy. I had to be dreaming, a strange bizarre nightmare of something or another had struck me in the night, until I saw sky blue eyes flash red. I wailed.

This was wrong it shouldn't be happening. It wasn't natural, such a color, such a feeling in my small and fragile bones to feel. Like my body was breaking apart without any force truly acting upon me. It wasn't right and all I could think was, _getmeoutgetmeoutgetmeout_.

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><p><strong>So there we go the next chapter will be up within the next week.<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**Kind of short and all but I said I was taking my time so I am. My new computer broke down and I had to get it fixed and It came to me that this file was stored in some hidden file and I chose to finish editing and post it. Might have another chapter later today if I can get the time, but God if school isn't killing me. Only half way to Christmas, hope I can make it. **

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><p>This had to be some demented trick. An attack upon my senses of some kind, but who and why? I had no connections, I was an average girl, living my life moving towards the end of high school and onto college and all that good stuff. It was too much to soon and my frazzled nerves couldn't stand it.<p>

When I had begun to cry they tried to snatch me away. They realized some folly in their plans and had remembered me and the possible danger that I had been left in. But a thick red cloud of power kept them away. It was a fascinating and frightening shade of red, a mix between the color of blood and the color of a ruby. It was like living blood and malice just inches from my skin, I wanted to die, it was horrible I wanted to just die.

Naruto looked at me and petted my head and mumbled things he believed would make me stop. But I wanted my fearful cries to stop, perhaps he was familiar with the cries of maybe he was not and they disturbed him? But I felt that I was not the first to cry out in fear when beholding this evil.

He didn't want me to be afraid, but I was, I was, but I tried to stop, taking big sobbing breaths. I tried to calm down using to some extent breathing exercises that I had attempted to use to lessen and control asthma attacks, nice to know they were good for something. The men, including the silver haired boy oddly enough wearing a face mask, an elderly gentle man in red and white robes, and similar looking man sucking on a cancer stick, became more frantic as my distress seemed to empower the entity all the more. Using all of my will power I finally stopped. I still took big sighing breaths and breathing just bit hard, and I believe that my face was a fair shade of red but I was "calm". Hiccuping and tear streaked but not full out panicking at the very least. This pleased Naruto who laughed and applauded himself. It was to him as if he'd done some great accomplishment and should be praised for it. I let my mind calm itself, then waved my arms and gave a kick, freeing myself from my blanket like straight jacket that only increased the former panic. The thing receded back, it was a foul and bubbling sort of thing, like a visible odor, it carried and awful decay like smell to it, all the more fitting for such a thing.

Naruto all the while snuggled up to me. This in the time to pass became his favorite pass time. To encase my smaller form in his larger one, it was a thing that I began to resign myself to it. We stayed in that position for a long time and I tried to keep my attention to the conversation evolving around us, but Naruto seemed fit to ignore it and try to garner my attention as things progressed. He took to tugging at my clothing, a simple white kimono, and touching my face when I didn't look at him. I'm sure I threw him some pretty nasty looks for his treatment of my person. But he would simply smile and continue. Like he was training a dog by repetition. By reward and punishment, by early childhood manipulation that seemed more fit for someone far older then him. It was disturbing and it off set me greatly.

They named me Junpaku, they said it meant pure as snow. I had to be they said, to ward off such evil. For such an innocent being to survive beside a demon I must be. I screamed in my mind, I was not. I was a tainted and more then impure minded teenager and I wanted to go home. To more exist and live in a life a meaningless school assignments and childlike problems. Why didn't they save me? Why did they leave me to this fate? Why me? These questions never left my mind not for a moment as life went on I asked them hundreds of times a day. But never aloud not with every moment of my life watched and manipulated by the innocent faced bland child that I was made to be companion of. I hoped that perhaps the answer would lead me back home. It never did. No matter how I wished or prayed, or waited, it simply never came, or perhaps it never existed in the first place.

My first year, was like all the ones I had since I came to be here, was strange and difficult. They, the mysterious and still unnamed caretakers, tried to find out the limits Naruto and I could be apart before hell broke loose. It made me cry and whimper because they made my fear level go up, they were insane all of them. The blood and property damage was always a bright and violent reminder that Naruto always got what he wanted or else. Else he gut you like a fish and make the world around burn away with the that dark and evil red mass that seemed to have a mind of it's own. As long as I was within ten feet everything was fine. Naruto soon after learned to walk so the point was lost. He went were he wanted and let nothing stop him, it was bizarre how all measures of locks and bolts, even seals were easily over taken by the toddler. It seemed like he denied the impossible, he never got hurt or sick, he was simply there when he wanted and not when he did not want to be. I wondered one time if he was dead, he was as silent as the grave when I listened for him. He was so quiet I wouldn't see him till I'd motioned towards an exit of any kind.

He was determined to be the center of my daily routine. He wouldn't eat till I woke or sleep till I slept. He babbled endlessly as we explored or simply sat on the carpet. He chose the toys I could play with, the ones he disproved of were torn up and broken, if they were replaced or fixed he had what was known as a "fit", his eyes would turn red and he'd start destroying things once more and it took everything I had sometimes not to scream. He was adamant that I my favorite toy be a orange frog plushie. Oddly enough this part of his routine never bothered me. As that first year passed on to a second then third we had always shared a room, one night, we had just started sleeping in separate futons, something bad happened. Something that would further change the twisted relationship I was forced to endure.

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><p><strong>Happy Halloween!<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

It was late and after we had fallen asleep when I woke again. It was not uncommon I often suffered from nightmares or restless sleep. They often make me drink teas to help with my night time woes. I tried not to shift else Naruto would notice. A sound that resembled over excessive movement had him at my side urging me to share his futon and acting as a human teddy bear most nights. Any misplaced rustle would have him spring like a jackrabbit in May. I did not want to be caged the first time I was granted my own bed. In between trying to recapture sleep and staring at shadows, there was a noise. Small indescribable but still there. Easily dismissed but still heard, in less then a moment I was ripped from my futon and chilled by night air, a horrid roar followed a second later. Rousing many from their beds and startling me. I knew that noise the sound of an angered Naruto on a rampage that was that sound.

A sleep poured over me. When I woke I was caged in Naruto's arms the very place I had wanted to avoid. His grip was nearly bruising asking if I was "OK" that no one would ever steal me again, he kept on speaking but I said nothing like usual. I hadn't utter a single word since I got here I had hoped that it would make Naruto lose interest in me, I was broken maybe he would ask for someone else anyone else to replace his broken "toy". Myself imposed vow of silence hadn't worked though I kept the act up for years now a benign hope that like all other was quickly fading. He had simply decided he'd do all the talking. He went on stroking my hair, being gentle now. I feared what he'd done with those hands, having been witness to his "fits".

I bet he killed who ever took me.

I began to speak softly soon after the kidnapping, I removed myself from the vow I'd taken. The need to communicate was to much for me to bare and it allowed others to know I wasn't stupid or deaf. Naruto shouted and screamed in happiness deeming my voice the prettiest in the world. He regretted telling everyone and had one of his worst fits ever, he bit several people who ended up with bad infections and ugly scars one or two had lost their limbs, not mentioning the walls he demolished and the furniture he tossed about. I was so tired and frustrated at the time, so I hummed a calming tune to block everything out, it was a small, soft sound.

It made his red eyes snap to me as I faced a window not looking at them. I didn't realize I was making any sound just trying to block out everything humming away successfully lost. The world and the crazy people in it lost from my mind. Naruto, almost hesitantly, came to my side and rested his head on my shoulder. I hummed on and patted his head. He proceeded to use me as a pillow but I payed him no mind for the moment. There was an odd peace after that. A calm before the storm I was sure, but the serenity of it drew me in. And for a time for hours it was all we did. Sit and watch the world beyond the tower while I hummed.

It made sense that soon after I took singing lessons. I took geisha lessons as well, and learned to play several instruments. Soon after writing lessons came. It did occur to me until later that they were grooming me for something and even then what could I have done to stop them or him for that matter. Naruto had slowly learned to leave the room and then buildings that I was encased in. As long as he could hear me play or sing he was less likely to fit. But it was not always so. But every now and then when he did his outings out in the back yard/gardens and I was made to play and sing at the same time so an incident wouldn't repeat.

Then came the suggestion of the academy, of school, of other children. It was far too much of a dream to be true, it was a shame that thought was true. We were in the office of the Hokage, who was both my damnation and savior in this place. He was the one who placed me with Naruto and the one who made me to remain here. I was on the floor daintily plugging strings of a cherry-wood koto, it was of the finest quality, Naruto wouldn't stand for anything less. I softly mummer lines of nursery songs playing in tune. Naruto lay beside me like always during times like this. When the aged man mentioned the topic, he made it seem fun, it would be the first time we would be in a large group. It didn't appeal to Naruto, I had stop playing and leveled the elder man with a look. Naruto had gotten mad so I spoke. "I go too?"

He gave a sigh, relief that I was instinctively solving the problem, "Yes"

"We go to school now Naruto-kun." I told him, he gave a heavy nod. I continued to play, now taking up the moonlight sonata. These songs so well known to me had never been played elsewhere in this damned world. My teacher recorded each new tune that I took to playing. From there my name was stamped on it and the tune was sold. It was one of my few forms of independence from everyone else. I had never been a musically inclined child, I did take art classes but those were more abstract and collage then detail work. But a new body had given way to new talents it seemed, along with lessons drilled into my head.

Naruto gave out many conditions. For both the Hokage and me. He'd try it for one week and if he didn't like it well too bad for everyone else. The first day the caretaker helped me into a soft blue yukata. It was decorated with white doves and made of soft rich silk. Another strange thing invoked on my person by Naruto, I only wore silk kimono or yukata, I'd never worn a pair of shorts or pants. The aged woman guided me into the hall where Naruto waited. Her face held a scowl as she did so, as she always did so. The woman said it wasn't "natural" for a boy to insert himself so fully and so young into my life. I agreed but I'd bet Naruto would rather break my legs then let that happen. We never spoke of such things in front of him. In fact I never verbally responded to her tirades but I listened and wondered where she'd gained such courage to speak her mind so freely in a way I new I never would again. I wished she would have shared this secret that surely came with age.

Instead she guided me silently along to Naruto's side, who snatched me up repeating the rules again. I had to know them, because to him there was no doubt I wouldn't listen. What could I do? This boy would trap me in golden cage if he thought it would keep me safe and "happy". But today I was leaving the cage, not without a collar but my time my chance it seemed tangible for the first time it was almost within reach.

The walk to the academy was short, we entered the building and joined our gender groups, Naruto kept close eye on me and what I did, who I spoke to. I was several inches shorter than my piers due to my slightly younger age. This didn't bother me too much. The girls took to mocking my height. I simply sat and listened to the teacher. Because I had no last name I sat at the very front. Naruto was seated near the back of the class, his eyes glued to my form. I didn't look at anyone longer then needed. When it was time for lunch when he snatched me up. He dragged me away from everyone. I noticed a teacher watching I flashed him a message with my eyes.

"Help" I needed help, craved assistance like a drowning man did air. And I was drowning, that much I was sure of. I was to die if this continued much more, of that I was sure. I was trapped and wanted out.

What I had done was dangerous and foolish. My actions carried a weight of guilt for along time. But he had helped, or he'd tried to. But finally the realization came that anyone who dared. Dared to look at me, help me, save me would meet the same end. Death more earth defying then anything else on this earth. A death so morbid, a death of watching your innards torn out and all but eaten before you lost what ever was attached to your neck.

The man had been killed abhorrently in front of me. He cursed at Naruto, "How foolish! A demon trying to make an angel love it." The teacher's head fell from his torso violently, spraying blood upon Naruto's form. His face covered in blood like a mask. He turned to me. "He was lying right." He looked like a messenger of Hell come for my soul. My voice was lost, and a fear long gone came. In the old life I had been an asthmatic. Now the crippling disease had come back. I couldn't breath. Like a fish out water I could NOT BREATH. And even then what could I say that he was killing me? That his presence was slowly but surely eating away at my health? That if I did not escape I would die one way or the other? What could I say?

"Tell me!" he shouted.

I fell. I tumbled into the darkness that all this time I'd been balancing, dancing around for so long. I'd finally tripped, made my one mistake. I wonder what awaited me, would I wake up again back home? Or would I be doomed to some worse fate? I did not care all that I could think and feel was that sense of falling.


	4. Chapter 4

**I'm on a role with this story but that's because I have like seven pages worth of stuff, well more like four now and I editing and adding detail as I go. So each chapter is close to two pages or 1,500 words or so given my mood or if I add things or change them. When I started writing this I didn't know what I was aiming for but now That I have it mostly done I kinda do. So I trying to just type up what I have on paper.**

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><p>"What's wrong? I didn't touch you, did he hurt you? Jun-Chan!" His voice was fading away into a buzzing background noise. But some part of me thought her should know what was happening.<p>

"Naruto I'm dying." Despite my trouble breathing the words came out smooth and calmly. I seemed ready, fit to die. It was strange. I was still falling where I didn't know but it was a slow decent into death it seemed.

He raced me to the Hokage's tower. He was screaming and yelling. I could only focus on breathing. I felt like everything was becoming oddly enough too bright. Then everything was going dark. I was crying, I was going to die and suddenly everything hurt, the peace the calm was ripped to me like so much else and it hurt. Gasping and crying for one more breath, fighting for one a life's essentials. The last thing I saw was Naruto's red eyes before all was dark and the pain was gone.

When I woke all I could see was the ugly white of the medical room I was bound to. Naruto was there saying he was sorry, that he hadn't meant to hurt me, I felt so weak and even as the days lengthened and went on the weakness never left. Later when I was years older the Hokage told me my heart stopped. I'd been dead for awhile, that because of that, the nerves in my legs had become very damaged I wouldn't ever be able to walk far. I would be sensitive to changes in the air and temperature due to the weak system I now had. I wasn't going to ever return to the academy ever. The weakness of my body would be to prone to stress. Each word would make Naruto's wicked smile widen. Though I hated to imagine it, the boy to have planned this, it made my heart clench horribly. The years we spent waiting for Naruto to agree to return to the academy I could look him the eyes. Every time I did I wanted to roll over and cry my eyes out. It took a year before I could even sit up on my own. I was in hell this time for sure.

Naruto became a shinobi and started missions years after this incident when he was fifteen. Things would change then, and it was not a good thing. Before the academy had kept him away, busy with the menial things of history and math. I before I spent days playing games and talking to the caretaker, now she taught me to sew and embroider and even cook. I spent the days of my life sitting in my room, it's window looking out at the bustling streets, I mourned the loss of the ability to walk them. As I got older I spent more time looking beyond the gates. I felt my salvation was just beyond them, but I was a the visage of a cursed princess locked away in her tower. And my dragon was no push over.

When Naruto was assigned a team he came back that day nearly snarling. It happened as he got older, he would hide his rage and to save it to rant or destroy things here in the tower. I had learned over the years what to do to save the residence the trouble and danger. I didn't car to anymore blood after he attacked that academy teacher. So I buffered his actions if only for my sanity.

I'd told him to take a bath, that I had a gift for him. I handed him a handkerchief I had made that day; the item was decorated with leaves and the village symbol. It was a pretty little thing that would most likely get torn and blood smeared like everything else I gave to him. That was the reason I spent all my days making them he seemed to go through them like he never had any to begin with. Scarfs, jackets, handkerchiefs and the like were run through like water. I started to hum a song and pet his hair when he came back clean and refreshed.

"Do you like it here." he seemingly pondered. I doubt he truly cared for my answer. He never asked me anything if ever, and when he did it was something or other rhetorically.

"I've never been anywhere else." I answered as truthfully as I dared. Little did I know that that statement set things in motion. He often asked this question lately. It made me wonder what went on in his head. Naruto seemed to think a lot lately, about what I couldn't fathom and it made me increasingly nervous. At fifteen he was large and strong compared to my crippled form. He stood straighter every day to me, while I seemed to wither away here in the tower. While he flourished in his world I wilted like a poor flower in winter's coming cold.

The next day he snapped and threw a tantrum, he would be leaving for a long time to wave. It would the one and only time ever we would be away from each other for a long period of time. A sort of hope filled me before it crashed with a single glance at my unused legs. I'd barely been outside in the last five years and even if I did leave I wouldn't be able to navigate the streets. I had no money, everything I earned was placed in an account, a dowry for my husband or emergency money if I had to move out of the tower. To get money I'd have to leave and go to the bank, I couldn't fathom where it is. So I resigned myself to at least of few days of peace.

That entire day before he left, Naruto sat with me and I told him fairy tales and made him a warm coat. It was black lined with orange and red. I told him that if he didn't rip or tear it I'd embroider it. He said something that made my heart freeze just moments after, "You would be a good mother." He then kissed my forehead and left. I cried to myself, this was torture, this cruel beast that kept me locked away. How would I be a mother like I'd longed for before? No man would have me, I was weak and nothing would free me from this prison but a miracle. A miracle that would never come. Well over a decade had flown by me and life was a hollow imitation lived out through this cell.

Then the old Hokage came in not long after Naruto's team departed. The first time I ever spoke to him alone I told him I wanted to leave, I wanted to go far away, away from the madness, and the monster. He said he couldn't allow me to and part of me broke. I had screamed, asked why didn't I have a choice in my own life, when was the ability to chose taken from me and why me. Now I stopped caring, I went on and kept silent almost reasserting my vow a silence in a fit a depression. That was my life after the world was well ad truly ripped from me.

He came and stood in my door way, stood there a long time and told me the news I knew would come. On my fourteenth birthday Naruto would marry me. He went on to say he was sorry, I didn't know what to say, what could I say to him other then words of sorrow and hate. I simply nodded and he left. I swallowed my pride long ago. I felt no need to give it life again. I would live this demented fairy-tale till I could take it no longer. Then when my patience was all used up, I'd take the easy way out, or that was the plan at least. A simple and brutal end, but then maybe I would find peace in death.

One day turned to two, and a week into three. I spent the time outside for the first time in what may have been over a year. I tried to be as free as I was able, forcing myself to walk and playing music because I felt like it. I drew sloppy pictures and ate sweets and meat dumplings. I enjoyed simple pleasures of foods, self discovery, and true solitude. I never went out in public, I never walked to roads or streets but I enjoyed this once in a life time freedom. I wished that it would never end, I dreamed I would wake up and walk through a door into new life and real life and existence. But even though the room I woke in every morning was a warm peach color, the feeling in my heart was an icy cold.

The cold and numbness came and went, more so when the wedding planners came to inspect me and comment on me appearance and such. I would have locked my door to them, but I'd never had a key. And soon life went on and the freedom was lost more quickly then it was found. Naruto had completed his first C-rank mission.


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